2.01.2009

a week in the office...

So I think I'm finally caught up with all of our fun photos, so I'm going to share a couple stories from work, to illustrate how working in a church office is never boring. I'm hoping to incorporate these into a work of fiction eventually, but here they are in their raw glory.

A couple of weeks ago, an older member of our church passed away (she had terminal cancer). The service was set for a Tuesday morning at the church. The family had her cremated, and David, the minister who would be performing the service, told us that the funeral home wasn't involved in the service.

Monday afternoon, the day before the service, Jake, Storm and I were having an impromptu conversation about music when a older man in what appeared to be painting clothes entered the office. He apologized for his appearance — he was on his way to help his kids paint. He had a fancy plastic bag, the kind you get a really expensive chocolate shops, with the funeral home's logo on it. He set the bag on Shirley's desk (she was gone for the day) and said, "Here's everything for tomorrow's service: guestbook, memorial cards, thank you cards, a photo from the family, and her cremated remains. Have a great day!" Storm, Jake, and I managed to contain our laughter as we watched him exit the office door. As soon as the building door thudded closed, we exploded laughing.

As humorous as the whole situation was, I felt it was a little disrespectful to leave her just plopped on a desk, so we temporarily moved her to Shirley's chair. Ben, Storm, and I coordinated a Twitter release of the story, which drew some curiosity.
@annakristina28 "Here's everything for tomorrow's service: guestbook, memorial and thank you cards, a picture, and her cremated remains. Have a great day!" 4:26 PM Jan 12th from web
@StormDavis my life's a bad indie movie #178 standing next 2 a funeral goodiebag. fully equiped w/ memorial cards, thankyou cards, & cremated remains. 4:26 PM Jan 12th from txt
@bworcester Wow. Creepy. A funeral home director casually dropped off a person's cremated remains at the office. She's sitting in Shirley's chair. 4:26 PM Jan 12th from Twidget
I called Ryan to ask for directions, and he suggested I leave her on David's desk, as he was probably expecting the "funeral home goodie bag." Only in a church office.

The next afternoon was also eventful. Ben had noticed a fermented scent in the contemporary worship office a week or so earlier. That afternoon, they realized what it was. Back in June, someone brought half a watermelon as a treat for the office staff. The remaining watermelon was stored in the contemporary worship mini fridge. You guessed it. They hadn't used the fridge since then. Concerned at what opening the fridge indoors would do to everyone in the office, Storm taped it shut, and he and Ben took it out near the dumpster to evaluate it's contents. I was recruited to follow after with Ben's mac, recording the activity for the worship website. What we uncovered was a VERY moldy watermelon. It didn't smell rotten though. It had been so long, they had accidentally created watermelon wine, which was now running out the bottom of the fridge. Looking back, I can see it as a very biblical thing to do... turning water(melon) into wine... Did I mention lots of corny puns float around the office all the time?

All in all, I love my job very much, and I'm going to miss everyone when we move wherever it is God takes us with Ian's future job!